Not Quite Susie Homemaker- Hilarious Homemaking Fails

The truth is that I am in no way the perfect Susie Homemaker. I have definitely had my share of cooking disasters and laundry fails. Most of which are really stupid mistakes that I wish I could forget. Whether it’s the mommy brain, the kids distracting me, or just plain exhaustion things can and do go wrong.

In this post I found some other brave mommy bloggers to share their hilarious homemaking fail stories. It’s nice to know that I am not the only one with my share of homemaking disasters. Let me start though by sharing a few of my own homemaking fails.

Please don’t judge… LOL

One of my most memorable fails was the time I accidentally washed an entire box of tissues in the washing machine. If you are familiar with tissues then you know that when tissues get wet they fall apart into a million tissue crumbs. Not to mention the little pieces of cardboard mixed in with the clean clothes. It is safe to assume that the cleanup was a nightmare! (Note: don’t ever put a box of tissues in your laundry basket to save you an extra trip up the stairs.)

Some of my other memorable fails are the time I forget to check my husbands pockets and washed his entire wallet! I have also used bleach to remove some stains from the carpet and ended up with orange spots instead. In the kitchen I have forgotten to close the lid all the way on the blender and ended up with smoothie all over the wall. I have also forgotten to remove the cardboard under the frozen pizza and didn’t notice until the oven was smoking!

I can laugh about these stories now and how stupid they were, but at the time I was definitely not laughing. As you can probably imagine I have learned from these mistakes and try to be a bit more careful now when doing house chores. Although not perfect, I still make ridiculous mistakes from time to time. Keep reading to laugh at more hilarious homemaking fails.

“There’s not much worse than accidentally machine washing a disposable diaper…which sadly I’ve done more than once.” – She Who Has Believed

“How to pick just one. The most recent is probably when pregnancy brain took over and I put 2 CUPS of baking soda in a batch of brownies instead of 2 TEASPOONS! or there was that time I turned an entire batch of white laundry bright purple….. lol.”- The Vintage Millenial

“I just put a pair of bright red baby jeans with the rest of her clothes and well you can guess the outcome. I have an entire set of baby clothes a beautiful shade of red with some severe patches here and there.”- Shahira

“Not sure if this completely counts BUT I’ve ran out of the house for 30 seconds to throw out the trash only to find my three year old locked me out of the house. Pro tip: keep spare key in garage AND unlock deck door beforehand from now on. You can never be too safe.”- My Sweet Lilac

“I foraged a load of blackberries and thought I was going to be super star homemaker and made jam. But sure who really needs to read instructions? I made jars of toffee which set solid and all had to be chucked.”- Home Grown Heaven

“I installed a high-up extra closet rod in a back nook of our basement to store hangers/clothes on while prepping for our local children’s consignment/resale events. Instead of installing both top AND bottom screws on the support brackets into the studs the top screws ended up about an inch above where the wall studs inexplicably stopped. The night before the consignment sale – immediately after hanging the LAST tagged/pressed piece of clothing on the rod and before taking them all down to pack up for the sale, the whole rod ripped out of the wall and all the clean/pressed clothes came tumbling down. They were covered with crumbling drywall from the big holes left in the wall when the brackets ripped out.”- Super Mom Hacks

“Oh man where do I begin…how about what happened just right now…mom brain to the max..I was so excited that I was getting everything done before hubby came home that I did not look at what I was grabbing and poured toilet bowl cleaning gel into the dishwasher ….I just set it to rewash it all again…”- Mamma Bear Says

“I was trying to put away the bulk container of garlic powder in the cupboard and instead I spiked it to the floor. It burst open and garlic powder exploded all over in front of me.” My Joy In Chaos

“When my husband and I were first dating I was trying to impress him and hide the fact that I am what I like to call “domestically challenged”. It was his birthday and I attempted to bake an angel food cake. Somehow it came out completely charred black on the top while still being wet and raw in the middle. Ever since then on his birthday he says he just wants fruit salad.”- Real Mom Recs

“I was making salsa once and could not find the blender anywhere. I’m not sure why I thought this was a good idea but I decided to improvise with a hand mixer. Yes, a hand mixer. Needless to say, I ended up taking store bought salsa to the event I was making it for. It also took quite awhile to get the salsa off the walls… and everything else!”-  For The Love Of Mom

“Too many hahaha one that comes to mind is moving the washing machine and forgetting to put the drain tube thing back in the sink and flooding the laundry.”- Little Finch Designs

“I was cooking and put olive oil in a pan and was just to put in the onion when I noticed that my baby had pooped.  At the time I had a severe case of breastfeeding brain and totally forgot about the pan that was on the stove. When I got back to the kitchen the whole pan was on fire. I shouted for my son’s father who came running, took the burning pan and put it in the sink. He was so close to turning on the water but luckily I yelled “The lid! Take the lid!” We can laugh about it now but it was so close to ending in a disaster thanks to my breastfeeding brain.”- Awesome Alice

“I burnt my couch with my high powered hair dryer in an attempt to dry out a cushion soaked with water because Toddlers… true story. I burnt the couch.”- Love Life Laugh Motherhood

“Not long after our second baby was born, my in-laws decided to visit. In an attempt to impress them that I had my sh# together, I baked cookies (break and bake but they didn’t need to know that!) and put candles along the top of the mantel on the fireplace. We were sitting in the living room when my brother in law casually said, “Mary your mirror is on fire.” The mirror on my fireplace had a wood surround (which my in laws gave to me) and it was smoking all along the bottom from the candles. I was mortified!”- Mary Brogdon Wessel

Thank you to all of the mommies that contributed to this post. We may not be the perfect Susie Homemakers, but at least we are trying. Mom brain can definitely get the best of us sometimes. Please check out their blogs to find other great stories and advice. These women are doing great work!

Do you have any hilarious homemaking fails? Keep the laughs coming and share your story in the comments!

Not Quite Susie Homemaker- Hilarious Homemaking Fail Stories From Moms
Not Quite Susie Homemaker- Hilarious Homemaking Fail Stories From Moms

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